If you were born in December of 1997 you’d be in your teens now (where some of us, sadly, were on our way out of them by that time) Even if you were born earlier, there’s a chance you missed what some Shadowrun grognards called “The Clueless Files”.
These were a collection of horror stories, in a manner of speaking. It was a collection from the writer’s own game and contributions from all over to Paolo Marcucci’s amazing Shadowrun Archive (Now defunct, try the Wayback Machine if you feel lucky) of runners doing stupid things, with quite comedic results.
Sadly, the Shadowrun Archive died a death the way many fansites often do, and the tales of the Clueless were lost. With a bit of work and consternation, you can find them or references to them, but I’m going to put the entire batch up here at the Gibson Institute. Enjoy reading.
Karen, the creator of the CLUE Foundation (Clueless Legions Unearthed and Exposed), like the SA, has dropped out of the net. Attempts to find her have proved fruitless, and one assumes she got a job. The Casefiles will be presented here verbatim, each link below to a respective casefile.
This was the original introduction:
Please allow me to introduce myself. My name is Karen, and I’ve been GMing Shadowrun now over several years and multiple countries. Yes, an Honest-To-God female SRGM, who is affectionately (I hope) referred to by her players as ‘The GM with PMS.’ And don’t think they’re kidding :) Along with the dubious honour of GMing, I am also the President of the C.L.U.E. Foundation (Clueless Legions Unearthed and Exposed).
Over the course of my gaming history, I have been continually amazed at the ridiculous, bizarre, and at times downright hilarious situations gamers get their PC’s into. Here in the archives of C.L.U.E. you will find the ‘worst of the worst’ stories sent to C.L.U.E. (accompanied by moans of disbelief and despair) by GMs and players around the globe.
However, in order to keep the files up to date, I need input from YOU, Gentle Readers. So:
GMs: Send me your worst five aspirin/six beer runs-gone-to-crap, and your “I don’t BELIEVE they did that” situations.
Players: I need input from you as well, as eye-witnesses (or perpetrators). Tell me of your three hours of legwork runs blown to hell-and-back by acts of the Clueless. You, too, have stories to tell.
Using your input (subject to editing), C.L.U.E. provides the running public with a humorous look at the lighter side of this dark game we all know and love.
WARNING: The following contain complete disclosures of the existence of Cluelessness in the Shadows. Exposure to this material may be hazardous, as rampant Cluelessness has in some cases proven infectious.
Thanks Karen, I hope the students here at the institute take your lessons to heart.